Mark Reviews Movies: VALLEY GIRL (2020)

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Review by Mark Dujsik | May 8, 2020

The original Valley Girl has become something of a misplaced cult item, overshadowed by many other coming-of-age stories of the decade, so it's a bit strange to see a remake almost 40 years later. It's even stranger to discover that the filmmakers have transformed the material into a musical, and as vital as the original's soundtrack was to the film's appeal, it's odder still that none of the songs from the 1983 film are present in this one.

Oddities aside, this new version of Valley Girl is all artificial sheen, whereas the original was roughly authentic. It's amusing to chuckle about the fashion and style choices of a bygone era, but why does this movie, coming out 30 years after the decade ended, look more stereotypically "'80s" than an actual movie from that period?

The '83 film cared about its characters enough to give them flaws and provide them with moments of doubt, even as the film followed a pretty straightforward trajectory about a mismatched love story. This one only cares about its characters so far as they're able to break out into one of the movie's multiple song-and-dance numbers, based around recognizable pop hits from the 1980s.

The whole enterprise feels processed, in the way that foods are injected with preservatives and other chemicals to make them as generically appetizing as possible. Director Rachel Lee Goldenberg offers a lot of shine, with the bold colors and bright pastels of the costumes and the backdrops (The opening number in a shopping mall establishes the over-saturated atmosphere of the movie). She also provides plenty of movement, with the almost non-stop array of songs sung by a cast that gets a good workout from all blocking and choreography. The movie feels as if its very existence depends on constantly moving. It does, although without much more of a goal than the movement itself.

Beyond the fact that the simple story is rushed between all the singing and dancing, the biggest change, perhaps, is a framing device, set in the present day. The main story follows Julie (Jessica Rothe), a well-to-do high school student from the affluent Los Angeles neighborhood of San Fernando Valley, as she deals with peer pressure and love and her plans for the future.

The movie itself begins decades later, with an older Julie (played by Alicia Silverstone—a teen star from the '90s, in some head-scratching casting, as a representative of movies from the '80s) telling that story to her teenage daughter (played by Camila Morrone). Screenwriter Amy Talkington probably should have realized something is amiss with the storytelling when a narrator is necessary to clarify such a fundamentally simple story.

As for that story, the younger Julie falls hard for Randy (Josh Whitehouse), a punk-rock teen from Hollywood. She wants to date him, but her friends think Randy comes from a different, altogether incompatible world. They'd rather Julie get back together with Mickey (Logan Paul), a preppy tennis player.

Even those who haven't seen or have forgotten the original film can probably determine what's important to this story—matters of the heart and of class and of determining one's own place in the world, regardless of what expectations others might have. Does any of that come up in this new version? Well, to a degree, some of it does, although it takes a long time for the filmmakers to realize that even a musical needs a story founded on conflict and characters who should be more than vessels to carry a tune. It's either that, or the filmmakers simply ran out of songs for the cast to cover.

There are some moments here, when the big dance numbers and the pop solos/medleys step aside, that touch upon some authenticity. They're few and mostly near the end of the second act, when the ever-charismatic Rothe and the admirably sensitive Whitehouse get some chances to interact without their studio-recorded voices belting on the soundtrack. They're a good pair. In a better version of this tale, we might want their characters to find a way to make a relationship work. In this one, we just wish the actors had a chance to be in that better version.

Another moment comes much later, and it involves the framing device. The older Julie has to reveal the fate of this bond, and the bittersweet reality is juxtaposed with a seemingly happy ending. It's a touching scene, but for some reason, the movie ends with a coda that plays the fates of its characters as a gag. That about sums up Valley Girl, which never lets anything honest get in the way of a gimmick.

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