Mark Reviews Movies: ASK DR. RUTH

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Review by Mark Dujsik | May 2, 2019

Director Ryan White approaches Ask Dr. Ruth with two theses in mind: 1.) You can learn a lot about a person by spending a bit of time with them, and 2.) if the subject of a documentary is fascinating and entertaining and enlightening, it's almost inevitable that those qualities will transfer to the film itself. Both of these assumptions prove correct in the case of Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the sex-education expert who became a household name in the late 1980s and, at the age of 90, shows no signs of slowing down. That should be taken literally, too: When we see her walking through the halls of her apartment building or down the street, it's always at a good clip.

Such sights are constantly encouraging, because all of our bodies are going to age to a certain point before they give up, but that doesn't mean our spirits have to go along for the declining ride. Westheimer's spirit appears full and vibrant as she approaches her 90th birthday over the course of the film. She still appears on television and radio. At the time of filming, she has three books coming out within the year. Her long-time assistant, who schedules Westheimer's media appearances and more, says that he'd like to retire someday, although that seems impossible. His boss obviously has no plans to retire at all.

She doesn't need to do any of this, of course. One assumes she's wealthy, given that she had a radio show and a syndicated television program, as well as having written about 40 books and made some money on branding her name and image to commercials, endorsements, and even a board game. Westheimer has lived in the same apartment in the Washington Heights neighborhood of Manhattan for decades, and despite the location, she doesn't live an extravagant life.

She probably could have retired a while ago without losing a thing. Her financial situation clearly is just fine. She has two children and four grandchildren whom she adores. Her legacy has been cemented through her work, through parodies, through the fact that all of the TV doctors call themselves by the first name, and through the fact that, as a society, we're more open to talking about sex than we were before she became famous.

Westheimer keeps going, though. There's only one conclusion we can draw from that reality: She loves this work. May each of us find something that keeps our spirit as alive as hers.

The film itself is fairly straightforward, following Westheimer on her daily routine at home and at work, as well as taking a trip overseas to Switzerland and Israel, where she reminisces about her past. Many will find all of this new, since Westheimer rarely, if ever, spoke about her life openly and publicly, and if she did, it would have been overshadowed by her preferred subject of discussion.

There's a good reason for that. As a child in Germany, she grew up as the Nazis were coming into power. Her father, arrested by the Nazis, and mother—both Orthodox Jews—agreed to send their only child to an orphanage in Switzerland.

Even eight decades later, Westheimer seems hesitant to say much about this time in her life. The story is told through translated diary passages by way of a narrator and by means of simply animated flashbacks. Later, visiting a Holocaust memorial in Israel, she discovers the long-unknown truth of what happened to her parents, finding the date of her father's murder in Auschwitz and the terrible notion that her mother is only listed as "disappeared." Signing a guest book, Westheimer says that she likely will cry about later, when no one is around to see.

There has been a lot of pain in Westheimer's life, although she approaches it as she does her walking: not stopping and always moving forward. This is also encouraging, and that philosophy, although even her children wonder if she has ever truly confronted the reality of her past, has worked for the good doctor. The film continues as a biography, explaining her time in Israel following the war, her education, and her three marriages (The first section is also animated, but the latter two give us photos and home movies). The third marriage, in her mind, was the real one, to a man who loved and supported her as she became famous.

The rest of the story, of course, happened in the public square, but even now, it's shocking to see Westheimer on the radio and on TV, frankly talking about anatomy and biology. That's not because such subject shouldn't be discussed, but it is because she was able to do so in the political and cultural climate of the time. Even now, one wonders if a show such as hers could make it to network television without some organized outrage from certain sections of the internet.

What keeps the film from becoming too routine, though, is how much time White actually spends with Westheimer. She treats the director and crewmembers as a gracious host—always talking, always smiling, often asking if they want something to eat (There's a series of outtakes during the credits in which we see just how concerned she was about making sure the filmmakers weren't hungry, as well as how mischievous she can be with friends). Ask Dr. Ruth doesn't have to do much to tell an inspiring story, but the joy of the film is to see Westheimer in her element—which, by the way, is anywhere at any time.

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